Denver Rocky Mountain News
December 3, 2000

Split Decisions- Equality in Marriage Institute Educates People About Divorce, Prenuptial Agreements, Social Issues
By Mark Wolf

When Lorna Wendt was divorced from her husband, GE executive Gary Wendt, after 32 years of marriage, he offered her a $10 million settlement.

Not enough, Lorna Wendt countered. Not nearly enough.

She pegged her husband's net worth at around $100 million and considered 10 percent woefully insignificant compensation for her role as a diligent corporate wife who stayed at home, raised the children and ran the household.

Something more in the range of a 50-50 split of assets is what Lorna Wendt deemed just. Her husband contended his net worth is far less than $100 million. A Connecticut judge awarded her $20 million, but she is appealing.

The high-profile case sent nervous ripples throughout the nation's boardrooms and executive offices. Exactly how much is a corporate spouse worth when merger fades to split?

Lorna Wendt insists it's a question of principle, not just principal and interest.

"Take away the money and I'm just like everyone else going through a divorce," she said. "It was such a shock that he offered me 10 percent. It devalued what I'd poured into this marriage."

Lorna Wendt established the nonprofit Equality in Marriage Institute in 1998, two years after her marriage broke up. The group has launched a Web site: www.equalityinmarriage.org.

The site contains information on social and legislative issues related to marriage, prenuptial information, checklists for maintaining records and a large section related to divorce.

"The core message is you need to manage the process you're in in your life, " said Wendt. "You have to have correct information for you to make the best decision to affect you, whether you're in a committed relationship, thinking about getting married, going through a divorce or thinking about one.

"If you're getting a divorce, how do you handle the friends you've made, the support network? These kinds of issues come up for all of our constituents. Part of the role of the institute and the Web site is trying to destigmatize the issue of divorce.

"We don't have a right or a wrong answer, a yes or a no; we have information and we can help you find out the right answer for you so the decision you make is the right one."

Everyone should have a prenuptial agreement, Wendt believes, regardless of the income level of either spouse.

"I think the word pre-nup scares people," she said. "I'm hoping the institute is going to come up with a new word or phrase that means the same thing. It doesn't even have to discuss money. You ought to have this discussion about how much you're in love and how much you trust this person and want to spend your life together, but the fact of life today is about 50 percent of marriages end in divorce.

"You should talk about how you're going to split things up if your marriage doesn't last. If it's not 50-50 before you marry, a red light should go on."

The most distressing thing she learned during her own divorce was that most states (including Colorado) have "equitable distribution" laws regarding settlements, as opposed to "community property" laws, which distribute assets on a 50-50 basis.

"That means a judge makes a decision about your life," she said. "Ideally we'd like to see basic laws that apply to everybody across the United States.

"For me, the principle is that I was a 50-50 partner in our marriage and I wanted to continue to fight for that principle. It's not fair that because I have the money to pay lawyers that I may get a different outcome than somebody else who doesn't have the money."